Anyway, you can read a lot of coverage of the events at Disney and [...]]]> This last weekend, Disneyland Paris kicked off the press events marking the arrival of its – brace yourself – 20th anniversary celebration. That’s right – twenty years! I’ll pause if you, like me, need to take a moment and breathe.

Anyway, you can read a lot of coverage of the events at Disney and More, but the main point of interest is the new night-time show, Dreams. Now I haven’t been a fan of how the newfangled castle-projection technology has been used so far at the Magic Kingdom and Disneyland. The technology has loads of potential, but the shows in the American resort are the typical “memory/magic/dream/wish/memory/dream/magic” boilerplate that I’m so tired of. I don’t want to look at other people’s vacation photos while I, myself, am on vacation. Anyway… The good news is that Steve Davison’s team has really knocked it out of the park on this one and has delivered a show that is not only technically interesting but also entertaining and fresh. Sure it relies on the “clip show” motif of classic Disney songs, but there’s no shopworn “Sorcerer Mickey” running the show and nary a hint of an over-wrought, saccharine gimmick.

It’s a great show. Incorporating the new projection technology with low-level pyro and advanced LED fountains and water screens similar to California Adventure’s World of Color, it’s a technological tour de force that’s also easy on the eyes. The scene which ties in with Tangled (!) looks spectacular, and I’d love to see it in person. It’s great to see Rapunzel in a major show, along with nods to Princess and the Frog and even The Hunchback of Notre Dame. I know it’s Paris, but it’s still kind of bizarre to see Quasimodo in a huge Disney show in 2012. I do rather wish they’d used more of Facilier’s number from his film, along with its unique color stylings, but the demented clockwork creation was so cool I can’t complain.

Paris really came out ahead with this one; not only is it their highest-quality addition in a long, long time but it outclasses its peers here in America. Check out this high-resolution video; despite the rather irritatingly bad direction and editing, it still gets across the scope and impact of the new show:

It’s good to see Disneyland Paris get a break after two decades of tribulation; the resort is still saddled with the consequences of Michael Eisner’s decision to overbuild its hotel inventory in 1992. That debt has haunted it through the years despite excellent attendance, and has kept it from adding the new attractions that are needed to keep folks interested. Maintenance has suffered too – at times, over the years, the park has been so ill-maintained that it more closely resembled one of those abandoned knock-off parks you see pictures of from China or Japan.

Things seem to be turning around, though. The Disney company has poured some money into EuroDisney SCA’s coffers which has gone to long-overdue repairs and enhancements. The park is starting to shine again. A ride based on Ratatouille is coming to the moribund Studio park. Possibilities remain for replacements or enhancements of shopworn attractions like Star Tours and Captain EO.

Hopefully it will pan out. Things were turning around for the resort around the turn of the millennium, but Disney was contractually obligated to add a second gate and so EuroDisney SCA was saddled with not only more debt but also a park that was hardly up to snuff. Not only is the Walt Disney Studios the absolute worst – and worst-attended – theme park in the Disney empire (not even cracking the top 25 parks worldwide), but it forced upon EuroDisney the expense of operating an entire separate park. Without an adequate slate of offerings to draw and keep guests, it will remain a leech on the resort’s resources until it receives a sweeping and complete rehab even more grand (and expensive) than the one seen recently at California Adventure.

The original park needs additions as well – it’s been a long, long, long time since Disneyland Paris received a new attraction, and – as you will see – there were plenty of things planned way back in 1992 that have yet to emerge. There are twenty years of pent-up dreams waiting to burst onto the scene at Disneyland Paris; I hope they get their shot.

But let’s travel back to a more optimistic era – back in 1992, when “EuroDisneyland” first threw open its gates. This seems like a good time (if there ever was a “good” time to watch this!) The Grand Opening of Euro Disney. Broadcast on CBS on April 11th, 1992, this odd special features some of the most awkward moments in any Disney televised event, ever. But it also has some nice looks at a park that few Americans ever get to see.

For some reason the park opening is hosted by the incredibly awkward pairing of Don Johnson and Melanie Griffith. A “celebrity couple” at the time, these two have no obvious connection to Disney or France, and certainly don’t seem to have any live television broadcasting experience. Even more fascinating is the ever-present feeling that they completely and absolutely loathe each other; Johnson seems contemptuous of Griffith throughout, as she obliviously reads from cue cards like a poorly-programmed animatronic.

No really, it’s worse that I’m saying. I watched this live when I was a kid, and was incredibly uncomfortable throughout. It was like watching some unbelievably awkward public-access television event, like when my hometown of 15,000 would live-broadcast the small town Christmas parade. Cringeworthy throughout.

But what a lineup of talent! Cher! The Four Seasons! The Gipsy Kings! Pat O’Brien! I wonder how many drunken calls he made to Melanie while they were there…

Witness the awkward interactions! Not only our hosts, but Pat O’Brien surrounded by children! Pat O’Brien aggressively interviewing a French child about baseball with a dragon in the background! Candace Bergen going off-script and making fun of the French! And – because I can’t mention it enough – the awkward, awkward strangeness of our hosts. Why were they picked? Why does he keep blowing her off? Why does she keep making weird noises and giggling at inappropriate times? Why are they both wearing old-timey flasher-style trenchcoats? Did anyone else who was on the production staff think that was really weird? Why do they cut away to them talking over the fireworks? Why was this pre-taped event so awkward and roughly put together?

And then there’s spectacle! Witness the splendors of a park filmed, always, underneath an oppressive and gloomy grey sky! Witness actual park footage in an opening special, with actually trumps Walt Disney World. Enjoy the man getting killed as part of the wacky tale of Frontierland! And lots and lots of… acting! Enjoy Jules Verne getting really excited about Michael Jackson!

Be sure to notice (and laugh) when Candace Bergen is putting her hands in cement – the logo is for the Disney-MGM Studios Europe. That never-built park also gets a nod later in the show, when a sad list of “coming soons” are rattled off. We’re still waiting for many of them!

Between stern celebrities, lipsynching children, and live musical performances that fade out weirdly it’s a good old-fashioned time. Of course we get a visit from Uncle Michael E., and an always-welcome appearance from Roy E. Disney. At least Eisner’s scissors worked. And then there’s the cute-as-a-button Sabine Marcon, Disneyland Paris’s first ambassador. She was everywhere back in the day.

So sit back and enjoy a trip back to the start of the “Disney Decade”, when Westcot was a thing! I can’t wait until Russia opens in World Showcase!

And if that wasn’t enough to sate your appetite for Parisian wackiness…

Disneyland Paris celebrates, amazingly, its 20th anniversary this [...]]]> For some time, Foxx from Passport to Dreams has spun tales of the strangest Disney souvenir video she’s ever seen. And now, thanks to her valiant efforts, we can see it. From 2003, it’s Disneyland Paris: An Unforgettable Stay. In this, at least, they are completely honest.

Disneyland Paris celebrates, amazingly, its 20th anniversary this year. That puts this video, from almost a decade ago, at its 10th anniversary. The dreary and drab Walt Disney Studios Park had just recently opened, but that doesn’t dampen the enthusiasm of the video’s stars!

It’s hard to know where to start with a video like this, which chronicles a vaguely psychotic family – Peter Fonda, Skeletor, and their two children – on their three-day journey to Disneyland Paris. The overtly white-bread yet somehow terrifying family is of dubious origin, seeing as their dialogue is dubbed in what appear to be American accents. This is interesting to me for several reasons. For an international destination like Disneyland Paris, I guess it makes sense if you’re filming a fairly lavish promotional piece with lots of dialogue to shoot once and overdub for your various markets. Perhaps an international audience is more used to obvious dubbing than the US, and it doesn’t play quite so … cheap. Or cheesy. But what fascinates me is that they’re dubbed with people doing American accents. Disneyland Paris’s main English-language audience is the United Kingdom, and in fact this Region 0 PAL release was flagged with a Union Jack, so I wonder why they aren’t speaking with British accents.

The overall effect is jarring, and the combination of script, performances, and presentation almost makes you feel that the film was produced by aliens who had spent years monitoring our popular culture, television, and film, and really thought they could perfectly mimic a real, human family. But they don’t have it quite right, so things are just… off. It’s the uncanny valley, just starring real people.

Then there’s the fact that this is a souvenir video – one sold in the park – that manages to not only show precious little of the resort, but also has weird plugs for resort features like hotel room shipping, Fastpass, and parkhopping. For a long time I assumed this was one of those promo DVDs they sent you in the mail, but no – people paid for this. Imagine getting home, unwrapping your video, and… well..

Take a look.

And remember: People paid money for this.

There’s so much to say.

First, and obviously, it how creepy everyone’s interactions are. All the forced “call the police!!” laughter. And why are they always in physical contact with each other? No touching!!

I love how they make them this super lovey-dovey family and yet the parents are total jerks. Why do the parents laugh mockingly when they say the kid can’t have the video camera? Why the bizarre sequence where the adorable little girl gives a huge monologue about pin trading and then mom blows her off really condescendingly? In fact, mom becomes kind of horrible as the video goes on… maybe Walt Disney Studios park does that to you. Her heinous detachment grows – why won’t she take dad’s picture with the pirates?

There’s nothing you’d rather do to remember your vacation than watch a film about other people filming things. “I know – let’s show them the parks, only filmed on a vastly inferior medium!” On the other hand, hipster dad Peter Fonda presaged Instagram by a decade.

Also, what do most kids want to relive from their vacation? The rides! So on their three days in the park our family only experiences it’s a small world, the Disneyland Paris Railroad, Big Thunder Mountain, the flying carpets, the awful backstage tram at the Studios, the French version of Lights, Motors, Action, the Rock ‘n’ Roller Coaster, Star Tours, and Space Mountain. Note that only five of the Disneyland park’s attractions are featured. But the family does walk down Main Street at least a dozen times – it is a nice Main Street, after all. The video may not show many rides, but by gum it’ll remind you how nice that in-room package delivery was!

If you thought this film felt eerily Belgian, you’re quite perceptive. It was produced by this company, and produced and directed by this guy, Mathias Ervyn. To his credit it’s actually really well made – superior, technically, to most stateside Disney PR offerings despite its terrifying inhabitants. And it’s rare in that it features actual music from the parks instead of weird sound-alike tracks, which is nice.

It isn’t all fun and games, though. Not only does dad make them late for their 10:30 rendezvous with Aladdin, but there’s sweeping drama when Zoe goes missing in the Emporium (which, for no reason, they refer to as “the toy store”). Here’s a question – where did her cotton candy go? Did she eat it all in that one transition?!

And there are more questions. How’d they lose Donald in the first place? What kind of dance are they doing in the Frontierland restaurant? Why does Captain Hook molest the mom like Torgo? And why is she so intensely desperate to leave breakfast for the Studios? Why are we not shown Haunted Mansion, but instead get to watch dad finish his orange juice?

Speaking of the Studios, how awful is it? I love that the whole buildup of the movie is to Rock ‘n’ Roller Coaster, but then they make it look like a nightmarish hellscape that the father hates. Why is Aladdin lurking? And why is he so creepy? And why are the only characters they encounter Donald and Aladdin?

I don’t even know how to discuss what happens at Moteurs… Action!

Details: I love the peeling paint on Captain Hook’s ship, and I see you bass player with your earring in Frontierland.

All in all, an unforgettable stay.

Miscellaneous quotes:

• “Can I get the videocamera to film it?” “Noooo..” “Hahaha!”
• “Well. That is definitely a plan.”
• “Wow! Fantastic! It’s like a whole city!” “Yeah, this is really incredible!”
• “He’s got it upside down. Ha ha.”
• “This is a professional vintage camera – and my films will be magnificent.”
• “Oh yeah. You’ll see. I shall immortalize Sleeping Beauty’s Castle!”
• “He probably just quacked up.”
• “Kids – listen up. I read that this show has 130 animated toys, 183 accessories, and 319 dolls.”
• “We’ll ride that one soon. But I’m getting hungry. Let’s get a FASTPASS and we’ll come back here after we eat.”
• “Donald’s telling us he has to leave now.”
• “Will you buy me a Minnie Mouse please?” “If you give me a kiss.”
• “Oh, you’re right! We don’t have to carry our bags with the shopping service!” “Thank goodness for that.”
• “Hey, you know what? More paint was used for that ride than for the Eiffel Tower.” “But this is a lot more fun, right?” “You’re right!” “Oh yeah.”
• “Even after walking all day, I wouldn’t have missed this parade for anything in the world.” “My thoughts exactly.”
• “Lucas, finish your breakfast. You can film more later on.”
• “Oh hey, look kids, it’s Sulley.”
• “He can shake three hands at once.”
• “Oooh.. the world of cinema”
• “It’s time to immortalize Cleopatra – she is perfect for my film”
• “Oh, what a blast”
• “Yes… he was sleeping. He goes to bed early and gets up late.” (What does this mean?!)
• “Aren’t you glad Aladdin told us about this?”
• “Can I sit next to you on the ride?” “Yeah.”
• “This Studios Tram Tour is fun, but I can’t stop thinking about Rock N Roller Coaster. Did Aladdin say anything to you? Well?” “Just that it was the best.” “Aah.” “Well I guess Aladdin knows everything. Hmph.”
• “What’s that? What did you say sweetie?”
• “Well wasn’t that nice of Aladdin.”
• “Look daddy – I can trade one of my pins for one of his.”
• “See? I bet that’s the sequence we just filmed!” (OH REALLY???)
• “Ah finally! Time for a little action!”
• “Didn’t you know that ducks are chicken?”
• “Oh I’m sorry kids – I couldn’t help it. I was so tired. You sleep so well here.”
• “Ahh Relax. Don’t worry. They’re perfectly safe. Have fun.”
• “Hey, take my picture with the pirates. For my office.”
• “OK, you take them to the Blue Lagoon and I’ll get Star Tours Fastpasses. Ok, my love?” “No problem. Hey, did you take my picture? Oh, oh-oh, Julie!”
• “I know that voice.”
• “Aladdin told us that this ride goes really really fast.” “Aha! It really looks great!” “Oh yeah. Sounds fun.”
• “Yeah, and we’ll be back for your birthday.” “Yes kids, at Christmas.”
• “Hold up. Not possible. It’s over at Walt Disney Studios.”
• “You did that to save me? Ah-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!”
• “See you at Christmas!”

In 1987 The Walt Disney Company released a brochure to promote “Euro Disneyland”, their newly-planned resort complex near Paris. Since the design of the project itself was still in its early phases, a simple conceptual layout was the only piece of original artwork contained in the publication. The rest of [...]]]> This is a strange one.

In 1987 The Walt Disney Company released a brochure to promote “Euro Disneyland”, their newly-planned resort complex near Paris. Since the design of the project itself was still in its early phases, a simple conceptual layout was the only piece of original artwork contained in the publication. The rest of the concept art, which purported to show the delights soon to arrive on the Gallic shore, was culled from the Imagineering vaults and consisted of pieces originally created for Disneyland, Walt Disney World, and Tokyo Disneyland.

Many of them are familiar; there’s the mandatory Ryman painting of Cinderella castle, as well as his concept for the hub in Tokyo. There are pirates by Davis, Tomorrowland by Hench, and even Walt Disney World’s planned but never built Persian hotel. It might be a surprise to find them in this particular place, but to the savvy fan they’re nothing new. All of them, that is, except for this one.

"Ethel, pass the gnocci and the baked beans..."

I’d never seen this before. In fact, it took me a second to realize what I was looking at. In all the conceptual art for pre-opening Walt Disney World that I’ve seen, this vintage illustration was never included. But here it is, showing up years later as a depiction of what resort opportunities awaited guests at Euro Disneyland.

The scene is inviting – there’s the old world charm in the background, the swooping line of the monorail track, and the building to the right that looks like one of those mod Welcome Centers that promised innumerable adventures (and free juice!) to excited interstate travelers of the era. And Coleman coolers always mean fun is in the offing.

It’s a little bit disorienting at first. But what makes this piece really special is that depicts two – yes, two – Never-Neverworld concepts in one.

Not pictured: Dick Nunis piloting a gondola in a striped polo shirt

The first is probably the most familiar. Thanks to the internet, Walt Disney World fans who weren’t around in the early 1970s now know that there were five hotels originally planned for the Florida resort. By around 1975, the Asian, Venetian and Persian hotels would have joined the Polynesian and Contemporary around the Seven Seas Lagoon and Bay Lake. Due to a number of factors this didn’t happen, but these Neverworld resorts still loom large in Walt Disney World legend.

So the campanile tower (which would appear in altered form years later in EPCOT Center’s Italy pavilion) seen in our mystery rendering comes from the planned Venetian hotel, which would have been located between the Transportation and Ticket Center and the Contemporary’s water bridge.

The second, and less obvious, element of this piece of artwork is in the foreground, where happy families enjoy a tasty picnic and some of the recreational amenities provided in the Vacation Kingdom of the World.

This is Fort Wilderness. No, not the Fort Wilderness we now know. It wasn’t even called Fort Wilderness at this point. But a campground was in the plans for Walt Disney World, located roughly where the Wilderness Lodge is today. Here’s an overview from 1969 – the planned Polynesian high rise is on the left, the Asian is at the top where the Grand Floridian would later be built, and the campground is at the bottom, adjacent to the Venetian.

For all sad words of tongue and pen, the saddest are these - 'what might have been!'

So that is the site of our mystery rendering. A long way from Paris, perhaps, but a nice place for a picnic!

It’s a sultry Friday evening in 1981 and you’re spoiling for fun – what better to do than head on over to Mormon Night at Disneyland!

Yes folks, for the low, low price of $7 you can spend 7 PM until Midnight enjoying all the delights of Disneyland [...]]]> ‘Cause it’s Mormon Night at Disneyland!

  

It’s a sultry Friday evening in 1981 and you’re spoiling for fun – what better to do than head on over to Mormon Night at Disneyland!

Yes folks, for the low, low price of $7 you can spend 7 PM until Midnight enjoying all the delights of Disneyland – provided they fall within the parameters of the “L.D.S. standards” which will “be observed.” Your ticket covers all the park’s attractions save, of course, the shooting galleries, and don’t forget to thank the Seminaries and Institutes of Religion which sponsored your exciting evening!

For completists, the backs of the tickets:

This particular special is not [...]]]> Way back when, it was the tradition for every new Disney theme park – or even major attraction! – to get a big opening special. Euro Disneyland was no exception; it got its ballyhooed stateside debut when The Grand Opening of Euro Disney aired on CBS on April 11th, 1992.

This particular special is not one of the better offerings even in the often-rocky post-Walt television canon; perhaps as some odd harbinger of Euro Disney’s woes, it’s stilted and odd and kind of uncomfortable. It’s hosted, for some reason, by Don Johnson and Melanie Griffith, who despite being married at the time don’t seem to like each other very much. They’re not natural hosts, either, and Griffith’s seeming attempts to emulate a first-generation audio-animatronic makes one actually miss Kelly Ripa.

The special is so uninteresting, in fact, that we at Progress City never really revisited it as kids, despite playing our recordings of other contemporary parades and specials to the point of absurdity.

One interesting bit, though, comes towards the end of the special when Johnson and Griffith describe the attractions that are slated to soon debut at Euro Disney. These are the famous lost attractions designed for Fantasyland – a ride based on The Little Mermaid and the animatronic show based on Beauty and the Beast. Despite being designed and announced for the park, they were never built (although a computer-generated simulation of the Mermaid attraction was created for that film’s “Platinum” DVD release). Ariel and her friends have yet to make it to Paris; dark rides based on her adventures is currently under construction in California and Orlando.

The other big project mentioned in the Grand Opening is the Disney-MGM Studios Europe, then intended to open in 1995. This would be Disney CEO Michael Eisner’s attempt to build a second version of this concept after the Disney-MGM Studios opened in Orlando in 1989. Eisner was determined to make this park idea a global franchise; his other efforts would include the Disney-MGM Studios Backlot intended for Burbank and the Disney-MGM Studios Tokyo that he tried to push on the Oriental Land Company as Tokyo Disney Resort’s second gate.

None of those concepts would see the light of day, but a pared down version of the Studios concept would debut in Paris at the Walt Disney Studios park in 2002.

Take a look at the future that was, presented by the effervescent Melanie Griffith and Don Johnson!